Metamorphosis
"Eventually, the time came to sort through my old clothes that Dad had stored in his garage for me. Looking at them through new eyes was thoroughly shocking. I might as well have just raided the closet of an anorexic stripper. There was little there of any use at all, so most of it needed to be dispatched straight to the second-hand shop as soon as humanly possible, and preferably under the cover of night..." excerpt from my memoir, The Wild Side
It sounds funny, but the process we go through when transitioning from our old lives of addiction and taking our first tentative steps into the unknown are actually really terrifying. We have little or no money, and often mountains of debt, and simply cannot go out and buy new clothes for our new life.
But the most terrifying part is…
“What do I even like?
“Who am I now?”
That was real fear. My heart was banging painfully in my chest. Has my entire existence and identity been a lie? What do you do with that?
It’s good to just stop. Breathe. Cut yourself slack to be ok with, “I don’t know yet. I need time.”
Just like the butterfly needs time to take its first breaths, dry it's wings, and become strong enough to fly. Then it realises it is no longer an earth-bound larvae but a stunning butterfly with the heavens to call home.
As I took my old clothes to the second hand shop I thanked God for the second chance and asked Him to show me who I really was (and had been the whole time), and what the hell I was here for. And He did. God will tell you, too. Just ask.
Janet xox
Hear my story in podcast by Megan McChesney, Back from the Abyss
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! -2 Corinthians 5:17
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. -Romans 12:2
Put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. -Ephesians 4:22-24
Visit janetbalcombe.com to learn more about my books, blogs or to connect with me. To see what else I’m up to, visit: wildsidetrust.org, wildsideministries.com and wildsidedesign.net
